Birthdays was the worst days now we.....

"Birthdays was the worst days now we sip champagne when we thirsty"- Biggie

Five years ago, I moved to Atlanta without any friends here. I went to a bar to watch the All-Star baseball game and celebrate my birthday. Earlier, I picked up a nice southern meal and my roommate asked to eat some (I said no selfishly).  I go to the bar and order some beer. The bartender asks for some ID. I had him over my PA license and he looks at me. He gives me a faint smile and says "Happy Birthday". After 2 more beers he asks "How come youre not out celebrating with your friends?"

"I don't have any friends here"

I then tell him that I just moved and I hate my roommates etc etc. At that point, I was missing home. At least at home my mom would have bought me a cake or something, instead of my dumbass roommate trying to borrow money so he can buy himself a honey bun (story for another time). Then some girls next to me overheard our conversation and hung out with me a little. Bought me drinks and so on which concludes my worst birthday.

This year I went to a bar to watch the Allstar game and to celebrate my birthday. But I was surrounded with people I love. Sometimes on Birthdays I look back into my life and have a sense of failure. I see all of the things that I have not done with my life, all of the opportunities I lost, time I wasted and etc. But at that moment of watching baseball, I realized all the things I have gained in the last five years. I gained friendships, life experience, more knowledge of myself and more intimacy with God. I had a good day on my birthday, I have also had a good five years.

Thoughts for the week of 7/2

Sorry I havent updated for a while, but I havent been busy at all. I just didn't feel like writing anything. Has a lot changed in my life? Probably not. Am I in a good space and place? yes I am.

I'm doing paleo. Its a diet for all who don't know. Go look it up. Its restrictive. Its hard. I only did the first day. It kind of kicked my ass, but hopefully it will lead me to more discipline in other aspects of my life. Another thing that I am excited about is that I will hit the gym again. I injured my shoulder almost two months ago and I did not go at all. I miss the pump.

Our society is too much of a microwave society. People just want things to develop quickly, but sometimes the slow cooking option is the best. The new saying is "I aint got time for that". Its funny, but maybe you should make time. Its probably not the worst thing in the world to show some patience. We're the generation with no time for things that matter , but a shit load of time for stupid frivolous things ie dumbass things on the internet, youtube videos, TV.

July is the Saturday of Summer

Frances Ha was a really good movie.

I am a closet hipster

Superman's chest hairs......

Does the Rock look more asian now than he did when he was younger?

Hung out with some middle Easterners and they have great coffee and food.

God has been bringing great joy in my heart. Its amazing that He is gifting me everyday. praise the Lord.

I hate these high waisted cutoff jeans some girls are wearing. Girl your but looks flatter. Do you really want Pancake butt????

I guess men also do wear old man shorts.

Sixers made a great trade. In the NBA, you have to suck to get better.

Philly pretzel aint nothing wrong with that

I went on Google+ the other day and its pretty nice.

The housing market is so nuts right now. Its frustrating.

I like the YEezus album. The guy feels so conflicted. He knows he is an asshole and hates himself for it. Its amazing music. J Cole album is good, I love the Grouplove album.

Summer Songs that i like: Get Lucky-Daft Punk (obviously the best record of the Summer), Cocoa Cutter Kisses- Chance the Rapper, Bubble Butt- Major LAzer, Diane Young- Vampire Weekend, White Noise- Disclosure, Somebody Else- Mario, Blurred Lines- Robin Thicke, We Can't Stop- Miley Cyrus ( I know I know), Can't Hold us- Macklemore, Blood on the Leaves- Kanye, SDS-0 Mac Miller, Bitch dont kill my vibe- Kendrick Lamar

Hung out with some girls who were 21 in Philly. I realized that I cant do it. They are too young. But I also have to ask myself, If they were cuter would have been more interesting and engaging?

Married guys are hilarious.

Some people are sensitive.... Takes jokes better people. Stop crying.

Post Week 4/1

So three months have passed and the quarter is over. As I reflect upon the quarter, I realize that it has been filled with mostly bad news. So this year has gotten off to a bad start. Work is not going so well. Fires are coming up that I cannot put out. I have been really busy and I am not sure if its taking a toll on me mentally. Things in my life feel like they are not moving too much financially, career, future, love life, etc. I wonder what I have to do to make it move.

The thing is though, I am happy. Hum du Allah (which means praise God). Sometimes I wonder if I'm happy because I'm a total idiot. It happens when your stupid. You are just happy for no reason like an animal. But I have been seeing a lot of good things in my life. People love me and I love them. Goals I have set in the beginning of the year are being or have been achieved:
Love people more
Spend more time with God
Be more intentional with people
Be more intimate with God
Know God more
Know myself more
Get in better shape
Read More
Get smarter
Finish class
Be there for people when they need it
Learn to be more selfless (I'm a selfish mother f*cker)

Goals remaining or things I have to work harder at doing:
Lose weight
Better organized
Clean my room more. Its pretty embarrassing.
Travel more
Make more money
Do something with my career. Know which direction to go when it come to that.
Be a better leader
Serve more effectively
Have more courage and not be afraid to tell it like it is
Buy a tuxedo
Skydive
Keep my promises

Thoughts about this past week:

Never mess with a guy with tattoos on his head

This guy loves the Phillies more than I do. He has a son dressed the same as he is too. They have their faces painted as well. We high fived a couple of times.

Went to opening game for baseball yesterday. I just love baseball. I love the roar of the crowd. Drunk people yelling. Booing me. Good stuff.

Never buy a florescent orange T Shirt with a kool-aid man on it. LOL

Although I have a big head. Their are still hats that look good on me.

Got my first Easter Basket ever. I know so white.

Ate Easter dinner for the first time.

Having a road trip with five guys creates terrible scents and great times.

DRIVE IT LIKE YOU STOLE IT!!!!

Fast and Furious has the best quotables ever.  

Thinking about girls fighting is funny and attractive to me. I love putting match ups in my mind. Some girls look like they can just mess people up.

WU-TANG!!! What again? Yeah AGAIN AND AGAIN????

There arent too many funny people in the world. Its like the number of good looking people.

I think people like talking to me. This stranger just started talking to me and it went on for like 20 mins.

Songs of the Week: Pour it up - Rihanna, Bugatti- Ace Hood, Nails in your Hands- Hillsong, Daylight -Matt and Kim

thoughts for Week 3/25

Last week was rough. Car broke down, lost my check card and tons of bad things happened. But in that I found grace from God. You know what it was sooo good. I have to admit that even though I am suffering I am learning more about myself. Maybe thats how God is challenging me. Stretching me. Causing me to grow. I had a moment of anger when the old me would have cursed this person out and threw something at her, but I held it in. Thought about Christ. It was tough and hard not to just do what your instincts tell you, but I guess thats how we get to be more human and less of an animal. We aren't just slaves to our instincts anymore. We are more than that. I guess Jesus is trying to tell us these things.

A person last week said that I have changed for the good. Its a blessing to know that you are not the same old person that you use to be. They said that they heard from someone else that I was a certain type of person. I'm glad that I'm not like that. I hope God can shine in those moments. Those moments are definitely glory to God moments. You have to worship God that you are not the same. You are moving towards perfection. People think that in life you can only get to a certain level and plateau. I disagree. Life is about contiguously getting better.

Had a moment of grace yesterday. I have been addicted to this song.

So Im singing this song in my car. The day was gloomy and no sunshine at all during the day. But out of the clouds a beam of sunlight hits my car. I am overwhelmed with Joy and Grace. Smiles and Tears are on my face. Glory to God. 

Saw a guy blowing drying between his butt cheeks in the gym. It was so weird. I never seen anyone do that in my life. I should have taken a picture.

I'm helping a friend by being a resource parent. Basically she wants to adopt kids and she needs two resources. The resources can provide babysitting and such. So I have to take 20 hours of classes. I'm in this room mostly with couples who want to adopt. They have so much love in their hearts. Most of them are there because they can't have kids on their own. Some of these people want to adopt a sibling group of 3. They don't care about race, how tall they are and etc. They want these kids to have a home and they want to be parents for them.

One of the guys, Big guy and doesn't look too happy, is so in love with his wife. Its really sweet and makes you believe in love. He says as long as I have this woman here I can do anything and will do everything.

CGI has come a long way, but it can still really suck.

Not sure what to think about the gay marriage vote.

If you pay 7 bucks for a pie, it better be delicious.

You can make money when you find something you love and your niche.

Had a huge steak. A flinstone type. Food fixes things.

March Madness is great. It cannot be replicated by anything. Upsets. Cinderella stories. Teams who are suppose to win, just pulling out nail biters.

Its good to make your lunch for the week. Healthy and good.

lots of good things about being single. I can do whatever the hell I want when I want. Its awesome.

 Trying to build a relationship with my dad again its weird.

Opened wine with a shoe and a pen.

FGC might be my favorite team of all time.

Thoughts for week of 3/17

It was a very interesting week. God taught me a lot not only about myself and what I have to work on, but also about His character. I realize that God really knows me . He knows how to get to me. Then I realize that all the things that happen in my life is because he knows how to deal with me. Sometimes we just need to submit and obey. Its a very very very hard thing, but in the end it is worth it. Less trouble and your heart is more at ease also.

The whole Football Free agency was just great. So much fun. Eagles totally revamped their defense.

GSP is a great fighter, but not exciting enough. He doesnt have that killer instinct to finish people.

Spent a day by myself and it was really interesting.:
Saw the Life of Pi. I thought it was really good, but I don't like this new age pluralism. It also felt like the movie was saying that we make up God.
Went to the gym.
Went to a bar. So I go there by myself and people start talking to me. Maybe I have this approachable face. I start playing poker and these people are good people, but I realize that I would never want to become like this people. They seem empty and lonely. Lots of the guys trying to get away from the banality of home. Some guy is there every week and getting drunk. Girls? not too many and mostly they were unattractive. It felt like a sad place.

Only went to the gym 4 times this week. My goal for five didnt work. The bad thing about going to the gym a lot is I feel like I can eat more bad things like a true fat ass.

Little things I like about life: Non verbal cues. When you meet eyes with someone and you have the same thoughts as them and give them a look. They respond to that look.

People blame things on other people to much.

Smoked wings are soooooo good. Fall off the bone.

Old-school is better sometimes

Old-school is not always better sometimes.

Its fun getting to know people.

People love hitting big guys. Some girl just rammed into me the other day. I don't really mind though.

I really like hitting small people. Knee to the face!!!!

Women should use sex as a weapon. If its in your arsenal, you can use it once in a while.

I hate it when people ask if you know that asian person. Just because Im asian I know every one. Its more embarassing when you actually do know them.

Respect is very important. But I really don't care if its coming from a person I don't respect.

Not always good to sugarcoat things. Honest feedback is needed.

Saw an Asian girl that sounded just like a black girl. I haven't heard that since Philly.

I made dinner the other day. My skills are improving.

High maintenance people are tough to deal with. I'm a very low maintenance person, so I have to make myself more accommodating to those people.

Halal meat is good stuff.

Hum Du Allah- means "praise to God". I really like it.

People have been coming to me with their romance problems or excitement. I say stuff , but I really don't know what I'm talking about. I think I'm just faking the funk. I words have no weight.

Sometimes we think too highly of ourselves.

Talking to someone can get you out of your slump.

Kevin Durant has a huge hand and small head.

White People are so corny sometimes, especially when black music comes on and they are all like WOOOOOO!!!!

thoughts for the week 3/11

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Week 3/3

This week I felt lazy. Fell behind in somethings. Looking to catch up, but its always a challenge to catch.

Thoughts for the week:

Change is a necessary thing. If you don't think you need to change, then you are an arrogant dumbass who will learn that it is necessary to change.

Matters of the heart are always tough to handle.

Lots of times you just got to shoot people straight.

Bearskin rugs are nice.

18 & over for women at a club is not a club I want to be at too often. I felt old. A decade older than a girl is too much.

My hand is kind of big. Its fat too. Adds to the hugeness of it. I had my arm around some girl and my hand was bigger than her face.

I can still make a good looking female bartender laugh.

Ask more from God.

Talk often to God

Kate Upton thought: Russian mail order bride looks like her. It looks like I know where my Christmas money is going.

David Crowder puts on a good show. Always blessed by his music.

Some Italian guy told me to check some pizza places out in the city. Im looking forward to it.

I've been singing praise music more. I usually sing r and b and hip hop, but lately its been more praise music.

Broke my phone. Its nice not having it for a while. The apps I need are probably Kakaotalk (EmoJis), twitter, and google maps.

I like bothering people way too much. Someone tells me not to do it, but I have too. Then I get in trouble.

Got some good stuff at the church bazaar.

People are weirder than me . Makes me feel good about myself.

I think I look too interested in peoples boring conversations sometimes. This guy and some girl just kept going on and on about somethings. Finally I did the walk away. I think about the time I wasted and what stupid things I could have thought about.

I hate cock blocking.

Lyric of the week: "With wisdom which means wise words be spokin" Rakim

Tracks of the Week- The naked and famous- Young Blood,

Week of 2/24

It was a weird week. I went to a funeral. I'm not used to being around death and grieving too much. Its weird for me. I guess its weird for most. I'm usually a happy person and it did really bring me down to see a friend in pain, but I did see God working in all of it.

Past couple of weekends, I've been going out a lot. I wonder if I should stop or just whatever. One of my friends was telling me to just enjoy and do it, because when I'm his age I cant do it.

I've been learning to love more and turn off the hate. Its really hard, but life isnt easy. Its simple but not easy.

Chik Fila breakfast buffet is always a good start to a day.

Ive decided to go to Uganda for a mission trip. Teaching about healthcare and soap. It might be dangerous. Nervous, but I know that God is leading me for a good reason.

"I know I just met you but...." I had a lot of those moments.

I enjoy making fun of people way to much. But I also show my love through that. I feel bad for the people I love.

Home cooked meals are always a great thing.

People are saying Kate Upton is chunky. If shes chunky, I wish everyone were as chunky as her.

Sometimes I talk too much. I just have to do.

Granny panties are probably one of the worst things to a man. Something all loose a unsexy. Must be the same feeling women get when they see guys in sweats.

Jennifer Hudson lost a ton of weight. She killed it at the Oscars too.

Someone said I like black girls. Its true, but I like to think I like all different colors of women. Any Ice cream flavor is good for me.

Hipster girls arent too appealing. It makes me question when the last time they took a shower. Its cool you where thrift clothes but you can smell better.

I really like Jennifer Lawrence. Funny and sexy girl.

Apparently, I have a ugly black woman voice I make when I am making an impression of a woman.

"I asked God that when I sang it, would He let it move men's souls."- Marvin Gaye talking the Star Spangled Banner

There are only two options regarding commitment. You’re either IN or you’re OUT. There’s such thing as life in-between.”—Pat Riley

"Young girls are great. Young girls and older ladies- it's the in betweens that are a problem." Quote from Girls on HBO

Ben Affleck has probably had the most amazing career ever. He started off in lots of small roles. Got big and his career flamed out. He was the butt of many jokes. Changed his image into directing, and now hes back on top.  When people pull a comeback, Im gonna call it an Affleck. 

Big weekend for women in Athletics. Ronda Roussey headlined an UFC  and Danica Patrick finished in the top ten of the Daytona 500.

A woman's scent is memorable

Catholics have had a bad year Manti teo, Notre Dame losing and the Pope retiring.

Songs of the week- 10000 reasons- Matt Redman, Power- J.cole, I dont wanna - Aaliyah

Thoughts for the week 2/10

This week was a great week. I started off by going to a WWE wrestiling event. Then went to Charleston with my mom and grandmom. Came back and went to some impromtou clubbing.

Sometimes there are opportunities there and you have to just jump on them.

I have a missions opportunity. I'm thinking about going. pray for me.

My mom nagged me, but I realize that I missed it a little.

My mom is funny too because shes a hater like me. Its funny what she makes fun of.

When you are with people with a good dynamic, you can talk about anything and it will be fun like shaving.

Kate Upton thought: SI cover girl again. So Hott.

"Cant be mad at a pig for being a pig." is slowly becoming my saying

"Thats how I feel in my head and not in my heart" funniest comment of the week

Invest and love people more and more.

"When you get a good mango, you have to eat it then and there. "

This woman was wearing pajamas at the continental breakfast part in the hotel we were staying at. It was not good. I was just trying to get a bagel and I leaned over and you can see inside the pajama through the buttons you know. I was like dang miss please cover up. Like Chris Rock said, "20 year old titty Community Titty. 30 year old titty. Thats your MANS Titty". She was past her 30s.

My grandmom said my mom hasnt laughed or smiled in a long time. This week she came to visit me with my grandmom and my Gmom said that this is the most shes seen my mom smile in a long time. Its pretty imperative to get my mom down here and living with me.

How does Nas not have a Grammy???? 17 nominations and nothing. This is a travesty. Fergie and Kid Cudi have a RAP Grammy over Nas. It makes me want to pull a Kanye and go on stage. STUPID!!!!

My grandmom is funny. She got pretty tipsy after one wine. She also has this guy constantly calling her. Its pretty cute. But growing up she always had these old guys bringing her stuff and all that. I always found it to be hilarious that old grandpas are trying to run game too.

cosby show wife still looks good

hole in the wall spots are always nice. I think its bc you dont expect much from the outside, but when you eat the food youre like WHOA. I'd like to think thats what Im like.

A beautiful woman can make you lose your train of thought and/or give you the best ideas.

 Lyrics of the week: these eyes can't wait to see your grin....../ Baby these fists will always protect ya/ And this mind will never neglect you

Charleston Thoughts:

Shrimp and Grits are amazing there. Seafood was great. Shucked oysters for the first time. Seafood and Beer is greatness.

The house were like houses I've never seen. Some real slave owner stuff.

I asked people what they recommend in Charleston and three guys told me white girls. They are pretty beautiful BTW.

southern people are really nice. A little too nice. Some Asian woman said Hi to me and I looked at her like "WTF"

I find some people really awesome and they encourage me.

Songs of the Week: Adorn- Miguel, Freshman -Verve Pipe, The Weight- The Band,

Thoughts for the week 2/3

This week is a week where I felt lots of love from many friends. Life really can't get better than knowing that many people love you.

Prayer is becoming more essential in my life.

Stop thinking the world is just filled with bad things. Sure there are bad things, but people are trying to change it slowly. Start helping!!

It must take lots of people's hair to make Beyonce's hair.

Beyonce put a great show on. Destiny Child's reunion was awesome. Its weird that out of all the men, I was the most excited for Beyonce. Whatever shes sexy and talented. Kelly Rowland is still great looking and definitely getting me motivated. Her skin looks so nice I just want to rub my face on her legs.

Fast and Furious 6 looks ok. But a 6th one seems like its too much..... Ill still watch it.

The more you love God; the more you will love yourself and the more you love yourself you will love people more. When you love people, people will love you back and you will appreciate God's goodness and grace more and more.

I've been more positive this year.

2chainz- "She had a big booty so I called her Big Booty". I feel like he needs to come up with a better nick name than that. Although I knew a girl who had big eyes and I called her Big Eyes.

Kate Upton thought: She is still sexy.

Why do people care if people are in the illuminate?

Women need to know that they are better than what they think they are in their own minds.

People in America treat dogs too well. They are your pets. Stop making them the masters.

Never come out to Techno music when you are fighting, bc you will get knocked the F' out. (Overeem)

Frankie Edgar is one tough Mother F'er. Jersey stand up.

I learned the difference between a macaroon and macaron.

Eating at girly places is nice once in a while.

God put the song Little By Little on my heart this week. I will make a post about this later.

God hit me with some grace this week too. Smacked me in the face.

Richard Gere is an underrated actor. Arbitrage is a good movie, check it out.

Songs of the Week- Landslide by Fleetwood Mac, First Cut is the Deepest by Cat Stevens, How Great by David Crowder

A girls cuteness can just change up your day.

Homemade stuff is not always good....I'd rather have little Chinese kids make my stuff sometimes.

Power outage in the SuperBowl Theories: Beyonce, Bane and Katrina (too soon to the guy who said it).

I realized I need to dress a little more grown man at someplace. Im also learning to be more of a gentleman but the shek side of me doesn't want to.

Fashion thought of the week: I want to get this checkered jacket this one guy had but I think Im too fat for it....nah I know I am.

Joe Flacco and Matt Ryan are gonna get paid.

Ray Lewis might have played his worst game in the SuperBowl.

Is it weird that I want to touch Ed Reeds beard?

Sixers suck. I cant wait til the draft or when Bynum comes to the team.

Jennifer Hudson looked damn good.

If I lost weight, would my head look too big for my body??????

Sundried Sumatra Coffee is excellent

Saw an Old asian guy with slacks and dress shoes just working out. Stop it sir it weird, but hes old so he can do whatever he wants.

Fighting, chicken wings and beer is an ultimate guys night.

If I were old, I do whatever I want to .

Watching people talk is interesting. Im picking more things up.

I had to put a cap on how many women friends I have. No more. New women who want to be my friend have to either date me or hit the road. But women have good perspectives on things I never think about.

I hope I like my future girlfriend's friends because that could be years of sadness.

Lyrics of the week: We all need faith cause the world keep changing/ Let go of the illusion start some restraining- Nas World is an addiction

Throwback moment: Imma let you finish, But Beyonce had one of the best Videos of all time.

Sports teams

Superbowl is this week, so I decided to write about sports.

This girl goes (in a bitchy tone too), "I don't understand why guys like the teams that suck. Why can't they  just like the teams that are good." I held in my anger, because I felt like slapping her and sending her to God a little quicker. I calmly said, "Would you want your husband to leave you after you had a couple of babies and your body is not as good as it use to?" Loyalty is a big deal. When I see a band wagon fan (a guy who jumps to good team to good team), I judge his character.  I know hes not a stand up guy. Sticking with a team and suffering through the lows is the key....maybe to life. Sure it would be easy to go to some other team, but when your team finally wins after years and years and years of mediocrity it is soooooooooo sweet. Its like the nectar of the gods.  

Another thing should be: dont be a fan of another team other than your home team. I hate the guy who has the Cowboys as their favorite football team, Braves as their baseball team and Bulls as their favorite basketball team. Basically it says that you liked them when they were good when you were young. So from your childhood you were a little bastard who couldn't take the suffering and had to latch on to these teams to make yourself feel better. You should be better than that.

Thoughts for the week of 1/27

Looking back on this week, it wasn't too bad. God taught me some stuff. I realized stuff about myself. Learned that I might have to be a little more aggressive with work. Learned that I can go back to school.

Thoughts of the week:

I hate when people check in on facebook now because it will show up on my phone: "Dan Park is near you at IHOP." I'm like and what...Should I go and say hello to this person bc hes two miles away from me. No, especially if I haven't seen him in a year. I don't care if youre shopping and youre four mins away from me.

Fashion thought: I wonder if I should get a double breasted coat....

Atlanta thought: How could someone live here for many years and not go to Atlantic Station at least once?
(BTW theres a spot with a nice view, and I forgot where the place was.)

Hooters has Jello shots for a dollar.

Went to a place with 50 or more white people for a couple of hours. I was the only non white person. I haven't felt that in a while. I wonder if they liked me more because I wasn't white.

White people like my hair.

I still think Jude Law is a Douche. (Capital Letter for a Reason)

Don Pedro is always solid.

Starbucks having wine is probably the highlight of the week.

I probably only need my "me" time for only a couple of hours. Don't need a whole night or day.

Stayed in on Saturday night.

A blow to the liver is my favorite knockout. It makes the other guy look like a pussy.

The Rock back in wrestling is making me want to watch wrestling.

30 Rock is ending (sad face)

Bomba from Iberian Pig is awesome.

Kate Upton thought of the Week: she is sooo hot

Women: Its funny how one moment of cuteness can diffuse my anger or just cheer me up. I am defenseless.

I dont like women with thin lips.

Older brothers and Sisters are really helping me.

People are loving on me and its awesome.

Worked out the other day and made some friends at the gym. They were showing me new exercises and such. Its weird to make friends when your old.

Zero Dark Thirty is the movie of 2012.

Little people (5'3 and below) are funny and feisty.

Bought some Birthday cards. Why are there so many cards???

Beyonce was lip synced. SMH

Music of the Week: ASAP ROCKY: Suddenly

God thought of the week. Read my last post

Lyric of the week : Sensitive thugs all need hugs- Jay-Z

Prayers

So although there is a Valentines Poster. This is not a Heart day post. I just thought it was funny. I guess I am going to write about prayer. The power of prayer. In the Bible, men have shown how they can build an intimate relationship with God.  I have been struggling with prayer all my life. I would sit there and not know what to pray for. I wouldn't know what I needed or what God wanted me to pray for. Sure most of my prayers were selfish and self glorifying. (Sidenote: Isn't that the most assholish thing youve heard. I am praying and I am still looking out for my own good. ) I knew through years of church that prayer is about relationship with God. Talking to Him. Knowing Him. Feeling Him.  But I felt like talking to God was like talking to my real father. God was being unattentive, stoic and down right didn't care. Part of me knows thats not true at all, but another part of me thinks that way.

I think, since I have come to accept Christ, prayer has been the biggest obstacle in my relationship. This year I was determined to change that. I said that the first things that I would think about was God and at night I would go over the day with the Lord. I like it when someone talks about their day and all of the things that come with that day. Why wouldn't God want to hear that from me? Its been almost a month into this year. My prayer life is the best it has ever been. Is it easy? No. I still struggle to find time sometimes. But I recognize what I need to do. If I don't try to find that time, I can't expect God to find that time for me. I know what to pray for. I know how to talk to God. I know God a little bit better.

I also know that all I can do is my best with the time that I have. But since I've been spending that time with God. God has become like a lover. He has been consuming my thoughts. I think of Him. He has been changing not only what I think about Him, but about His people too. Praise for the Lord has been coming out of my mouth more. I think more faith has been developing. Knowing that this whole life thing we see is just God's story. The movie is not over with Jesus. This is part 3. Return of the Jedi. The Return of the King.

I have a friend going to Afghanistan doing a second tour. I prayed and asked God why? I was really stressed about it, but I met this army guy yesterday. He said that his army buddies were talking about how it has taken 10 years for us to get revenge for 9/11 and we had to go to this foreign land. But the guy told me that it was God's plan to open up Afghanistan. So people will know His name and people will know Him in all of the nations. I was blown away. I remembered that God has a purpose for all of us. No matter how small our contribution. God will ease our pains and give us understanding. Ask for it and be persistent. God will answer Prayers.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day and love

I read this today and felt like my heart was moved to share this.

A Christmas Sermon on Peace

Dr. King first delivered this sermon at Ebenezer Baptist Church, where he served as co-pastor. On Christmas Eve, 1967, the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation aired this sermon as part of the seventh annual Massey Lectures.
Peace on Earth…

This Christmas season finds us a rather bewildered human race. We have neither peace within nor peace without. Everywhere paralyzing fears harrow people by day and haunt them by night. Our world is sick with war; everywhere we turn we see its ominous possibilities. And yet, my friends, the Christmas hope for peace and good will toward all men can no longer be dismissed as a kind of pious dream of some utopian. If we don’t have good will toward men in this world, we will destroy ourselves by the misuse of our own instruments and our own power. Wisdom born of experience should tell us that war is obsolete. There may have been a time when war served as a negative good by preventing the spread and growth of an evil force, but the very destructive power of modern weapons of warfare eliminates even the possibility that war may any longer serve as a negative good. And so, if we assume that life is worth living, if we assume that mankind has a right to survive, then we must find an alternative to war?and so let us this morning explore the conditions for peace. Let us this morning think anew on the meaning of that Christmas hope: “Peace on Earth, Good Will toward Men.” And as we explore these conditions, I would like to suggest that modern man really go all out to study the meaning of nonviolence, its philosophy and its strategy.

We have experimented with the meaning of nonviolence in our struggle for racial justice in the United States, but now the time has come for man to experiment with nonviolence in all areas of human conflict, and that means nonviolence on an international scale.

Now let me suggest first that if we are to have peace on earth, our loyalties must become ecumenical rather than sectional. Our loyalties must transcend our race, our tribe, our class, and our nation; and this means we must develop a world perspective. No individual can live alone; no nation can live alone, and as long as we try, the more we are going to have war in this world. Now the judgment of God is upon us, and we must either learn to live together as brothers or we are all going to perish together as fools.

Yes, as nations and individuals, we are interdependent. I have spoken to you before of our visit to India some years ago. It was a marvelous experience; but I say to you this morning that there were those depressing moments. How can one avoid being depressed when one sees with one’s own eyes evidences of millions of people going to bed hungry at night? How can one avoid being depressed when one sees with ones own eyes thousands of people sleeping on the sidewalks at night? More than a million people sleep on the sidewalks of Bombay every night; more than half a million sleep on the sidewalks of Calcutta every night. They have no houses to go into. They have no beds to sleep in. As I beheld these conditions, something within me cried out: “Can we in America stand idly by and not be concerned?” And an answer came: “Oh, no!” And I started thinking about the fact that right here in our country we spend millions of dollars every day to store surplus food; and I said to myself: “I know where we can store that food free of charge? in the wrinkled stomachs of the millions of God’s children in Asia, Africa, Latin America, and even in our own nation, who go to bed hungry at night.”

It really boils down to this: that all life is interrelated. We are all caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied into a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. We are made to live together because of the interrelated structure of reality. Did you ever stop to think that you can’t leave for your job in the morning without being dependent on most of the world? You get up in the morning and go to the bathroom and reach over for the sponge, and that’s handed to you by a Pacific islander. You reach for a bar of soap, and that’s given to you at the hands of a Frenchman. And then you go into the kitchen to drink your coffee for the morning, and that’s poured into your cup by a South American. And maybe you want tea: that’s poured into your cup by a Chinese. Or maybe you’re desirous of having cocoa for breakfast, and that’s poured into your cup by a West African. And then you reach over for your toast, and that’s given to you at the hands of an English-speaking farmer, not to mention the baker. And before you finish eating breakfast in the morning, you’ve depended on more than half of the world. This is the way our universe is structured, this is its interrelated quality. We aren’t going to have peace on earth until we recognize this basic fact of the interrelated structure of all reality.

Now let me say, secondly, that if we are to have peace in the world, men and nations must embrace the nonviolent affirmation that ends and means must cohere. One of the great philosophical debates of history has been over the whole question of means and ends. And there have always been those who argued that the end justifies the means, that the means really aren’t important. The important thing is to get to the end, you see.

So, if you’re seeking to develop a just society, they say, the important thing is to get there, and the means are really unimportant; any means will do so long as they get you there? they may be violent, they may be untruthful means; they may even be unjust means to a just end. There have been those who have argued this throughout history. But we will never have peace in the world until men everywhere recognize that ends are not cut off from means, because the means represent the ideal in the making, and the end in process, and ultimately you can’t reach good ends through evil means, because the means represent the seed and the end represents the tree.

It’s one of the strangest things that all the great military geniuses of the world have talked about peace. The conquerors of old who came killing in pursuit of peace, Alexander, Julius Caesar, Charlemagne, and Napoleon, were akin in seeking a peaceful world order. If you will read Mein Kampf closely enough, you will discover that Hitler contended that everything he did in Germany was for peace. And the leaders of the world today talk eloquently about peace. Every time we drop our bombs in North Vietnam, President Johnson talks eloquently about peace. What is the problem? They are talking about peace as a distant goal, as an end we seek, but one day we must come to see that peace is not merely a distant goal we seek, but that it is a means by which we arrive at that goal. We must pursue peaceful ends through peaceful means. All of this is saying that, in the final analysis, means and ends must cohere because the end is preexistent in the means, and ultimately destructive means cannot bring about constructive ends.

Now let me say that the next thing we must be concerned about if we are to have peace on earth and good will toward men is the nonviolent affirmation of the sacredness of all human life. Every man is somebody because he is a child of God. And so when we say “Thou shalt not kill,” we’re really saying that human life is too sacred to be taken on the battlefields of the world. Man is more than a tiny vagary of whirling electrons or a wisp of smoke from a limitless smoldering. Man is a child of God, made in His image, and therefore must be respected as such. Until men see this everywhere, until nations see this everywhere, we will be fighting wars. One day somebody should remind us that, even though there may be political and ideological differences between us, the Vietnamese are our brothers, the Russians are our brothers, the Chinese are our brothers; and one day we’ve got to sit down together at the table of brotherhood. But in Christ there is neither Jew nor Gentile. In Christ there is neither male nor female. In Christ there is neither Communist nor capitalist. In Christ, somehow, there is neither bound nor free. We are all one in Christ Jesus. And when we truly believe in the sacredness of human personality, we won’t exploit people, we won’t trample over people with the iron feet of oppression, we won’t kill anybody.

There are three words for “love” in the Greek New Testament; one is the word “eros.” Eros is a sort of esthetic, romantic love. Plato used to talk about it a great deal in his dialogues, the yearning of the soul for the realm of the divine. And there is and can always be something beautiful about eros, even in its expressions of romance. Some of the most beautiful love in all of the world has been expressed this way.

Then the Greek language talks about “philia,” which is another word for love, and philia is a kind of intimate love between personal friends. This is the kind of love you have for those people that you get along with well, and those whom you like on this level you love because you are loved.

Then the Greek language has another word for love, and that is the word “agape.” Agape is more than romantic love, it is more than friendship. Agape is understanding, creative, redemptive good will toward all men. Agape is an overflowing love which seeks nothing in return. Theologians would say that it is the love of God operating in the human heart. When you rise to love on this level, you love all men not because you like them, not because their ways appeal to you, but you love them because God loves them. This is what Jesus meant when he said, “Love your enemies.” And I’m happy that he didn’t say, “Like your enemies,” because there are some people that I find it pretty difficult to like. Liking is an affectionate emotion, and I can’t like anybody who would bomb my home. I can’t like anybody who would exploit me. I can’t like anybody who would trample over me with injustices. I can’t like them. I can’t like anybody who threatens to kill me day in and day out. But Jesus reminds us that love is greater than liking. Love is understanding, creative, redemptive good will toward all men. And I think this is where we are, as a people, in our struggle for racial justice. We can’t ever give up. We must work passionately and unrelentingly for first-class citizenship. We must never let up in our determination to remove every vestige of segregation and discrimination from our nation, but we shall not in the process relinquish our privilege to love.

I’ve seen too much hate to want to hate, myself, and I’ve seen hate on the faces of too many sheriffs, too many white citizens’ councilors, and too many Klansmen of the South to want to hate, myself; and every time I see it, I say to myself, hate is too great a burden to bear. Somehow we must be able to stand up before our most bitter opponents and say: “We shall match your capacity to inflict suffering by our capacity to endure suffering. We will meet your physical force with soul force. Do to us what you will and we will still love you. We cannot in all good conscience obey your unjust laws and abide by the unjust system, because non-cooperation with evil is as much a moral obligation as is cooperation with good, and so throw us in jail and we will still love you. Bomb our homes and threaten our children, and, as difficult as it is, we will still love you. Send your hooded perpetrators of violence into our communities at the midnight hour and drag us out on some wayside road and leave us half-dead as you beat us, and we will still love you. Send your propaganda agents around the country, and make it appear that we are not fit, culturally and otherwise, for integration, and we’ll still love you. But be assured that we’ll wear you down by our capacity to suffer, and one day we will win our freedom. We will not only win freedom for ourselves; we will so appeal to your heart and conscience that we will win you in the process, and our victory will be a double victory.”

If there is to be peace on earth and good will toward men, we must finally believe in the ultimate morality of the universe, and believe that all reality hinges on moral foundations. Something must remind us of this as we once again stand in the Christmas season and think of the Easter season simultaneously, for the two somehow go together. Christ came to show us the way. Men love darkness rather than the light, and they crucified him, and there on Good Friday on the cross it was still dark, but then Easter came, and Easter is an eternal reminder of the fact that the truth-crushed earth will rise again. Easter justifies Carlyle in saying, “No lie can live forever.” And so this is our faith, as we continue to hope for peace on earth and good will toward men: let us know that in the process we have cosmic companionship.

In 1963, on a sweltering August afternoon, we stood in Washington, D.C., and talked to the nation about many things. Toward the end of that afternoon, I tried to talk to the nation about a dream that I had had, and I must confess to you today that not long after talking about that dream I started seeing it turn into a nightmare. I remember the first time I saw that dream turn into a nightmare, just a few weeks after I had talked about it. It was when four beautiful, unoffending, innocent Negro girls were murdered in a church in Birmingham, Alabama. I watched that dream turn into a nightmare as I moved through the ghettos of the nation and saw my black brothers and sisters perishing on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity, and saw the nation doing nothing to grapple with the Negroes’ problem of poverty. I saw that dream turn into a nightmare as I watched my black brothers and sisters in the midst of anger and understandable outrage, in the midst of their hurt, in the midst of their disappointment, turn to misguided riots to try to solve that problem. I saw that dream turn into a nightmare as I watched the war in Vietnam escalating, and as I saw so-called military advisors, sixteen thousand strong, turn into fighting soldiers until today over five hundred thousand American boys are fighting on Asian soil. Yes, I am personally the victim of deferred dreams, of blasted hopes, but in spite of that I close today by saying I still have a dream, because, you know, you can’t give up in life. If you lose hope, somehow you lose that vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that courage to be, that quality that helps you go on in spite of all. And so today I still have a dream.

I have a dream that one day men will rise up and come to see that they are made to live together as brothers. I still have a dream this morning that one day every Negro in this country, every colored person in the world, will be judged on the basis of the content of his character rather than the color of his skin, and every man will respect the dignity and worth of human personality. I still have a dream that one day the idle industries of Appalachia will be revitalized, and the empty stomachs of Mississippi will be filled, and brotherhood will be more than a few words at the end of a prayer, but rather the first order of business on every legislative agenda. I still have a dream today that one day justice will roll down like water, and righteousness like a mighty stream. I still have a dream today that in all of our state houses and city halls men will be elected to go there who will do justly and love mercy and walk humbly with their God. I still have a dream today that one day war will come to an end, that men will beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks, that nations will no longer rise up against nations, neither will they study war any more. I still have a dream today that one day the lamb and the lion will lie down together and every man will sit under his own vine and fig tree and none shall be afraid. I still have a dream today that one day every valley shall be exalted and every mountain and hill will be made low, the rough places will be made smooth and the crooked places straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together. I still have a dream that with this faith we will be able to adjourn the councils of despair and bring new light into the dark chambers of pessimism. With this faith we will be able to speed up the day when there will be peace on earth and good will toward men. It will be a glorious day, the morning stars will sing together, and the sons of God will shout for joy.

What Grown men should do

What a grown ass man should do:

Show people why it is in there best interest to do the right thing.

Appreciate beauty and life. Encourage people if you see something good in other people.

Drink Whiskey. Its good for you.

Have at least one suit.

When someone buys you a shot, you have to buy one back. Its just how it is. Lets not be cheap asses.

Always buy dinner on the first date. This guy told me he went dutch with a girl. I slapped him.

Open the door for a woman. Just do it.

Give your seat to a pregnant woman. Although I heard of someone was thinking this woman was pregnant, but she was just fat.

Don't order a salad on the first date. What are you ???

Always eat pizza with your hands. I dont care if your hands get messy. Its called a sink, use it.

Eat ribs with your hands too.

Make decisions with out influence from your parents or friends.

Be Bold. Take Risks. Don't be a Pu$$y.

Stand up for yourself. We are grown ass men. You are not a child anymore.

Get punched in the face at least once in your life.

Punch someone in the face at least once in your life.

Have a car. Unless you live in NY, Korea or someplace where public transportation is awesome. Don't be that guy asking for rides.

Build or repair something with your hands.

Dont ask a woman out by text. Definitely not by Facebook.

Know your weaknesses and look to improve on them.

What Grown Men Shouldn't do

Here is a list of what Grown Ass Men shouldn't do

Don't ever take a self picture or Koreans call it selfca and post it on Facebook, unless you got something new you have to show off like a new rolex or expensive ass car. Especially the half naked picture of you in the bathroom.

Never wear Jean Shorts or Jorts, unless your Black. Most black people can pull off anything. Maybe its the whole slavery issue. But some rules don't apply to them.

Never be disrespectful to people. You never know when its gonna bite you back.

Never undertip.

Don't speak like a teenager. Especially if your not a slang person.

Don't say YOLO.

Dont wear those stupid shirts. You know the ones that say im with stupid or something like that.

Don't sag your pants. C'mon Man.

Don't Wear white socks with black shoes.

Stop Wearing Jerseys and you're not watching a game or going to the game.

If your older than 33, stop going to the clubs and stop trying to pick up girls who are a decade younger than you. You know youre that old creepy guy at the club right? You know the guy you made fun of when you were 23. Yeah thats you now. Don't be a douche. Go somewhere else. Pick up women at barnes and nobles.

Dont whisper in another guys ear. Its weird.

You shouldn't be fighting. If someone picks a fight with you or there is some injustice, go ahead and fight. But when I was younger, I would just fight with people because my friend got ice grilled by someone. Those are not good reasons to fight.

Don't Cry in front of other men about a woman. Dont do it. People will never look at you the same. You better be drunk. Or if they are dead. You can cry everytime then.