Coworkers

My work place is not your average work place. I work at a bank but its in a supermarket. Some people will look at it a certain way. But I dont care, the money is the same as if I worked in a traditional bank.Were a very slow bank. So I have to be creative to get my clientele.the atmosphere is very relaxed.  I kind of get to do what I want.  I want to go eat or sometimes I just walk around and meet new people. I picked up a girl one time in the supermarket (thats a story for another day).

My coworkers are interesting. We are a good team. We genuinely care about each other. We try to help each other. Although whenever you are around people that long and that often little things bother you about them. My coworkers are messy and unorganized. Im not the most organized or clean person in the world but some of these ladies put me to shame. But all in all my coworkers are hilarious and its because we are so different. We love to mess around with each other and many times you'll hear us just being loud and joking with each other. We always say something is racist and pretty much say anything.

I always have to start with my boss because she sets the tone. She's a tall light skinned black lady who has very pretty features. She is not bad looking but she thinks shes the shit. Shes cool and as she likes to always point out (shes down to earth), very nice and sweet person, but is fake many times. Shes constantly making fun of people, cursing, making jokes and dancing. i always make fun of her and she just goes "Shut up Dan". Then she looks at me with her huge eyes trying to stare me down. She knows that it never affects me because too many women have looked at me like that over the years to affect me. I have like a bullet proof vest to those glazes. I usually just smile it off.

Second coworker is this black woman (pretty Girl with a pretty face and a big butt. There was this guy who just almost fell over when he was looking at her booty.) who always has some drama in her life. She is a woman who has boyfriend, mother , baby daddy, and etc drama. But I've got to say that she is so funny. She will crack jokes, dance, sing and etc. Yesterday she was talking about how she was having to run to the bathroom. She seems to sabotage herself many ways with the men she has or the job opportunities. 

The tellers are two white guys. The first guy is super anal. Hates it when someone touches his pens. He loves anime, pokemon and nintendo. One of my former coworkers thought he was gay but hes just a nerd. He likes to work out and hes very lean. He'll talk to someone about video games for hours. I argue with him about sports all the time. Hes very stubborn and hard headed, but hes funny too. He throws shots at people. 

The other teller we call the senator. Looks like an average SEC white guy. He dressed in his khakis and has the side part or qualf. He's into younger girls and that has gotten him into trouble. Like a bullshitter, he tells me hes not looking for a relationship but the last girl he was with he got attached to her. He's very bro. He goes, "hey broski, you doneski soon?" Then makes up words. So we make fun of him and he seems to roll with it. He goes bro-did-illi-de-de.  We call him white CT. He's not the best worker. He messes up all the time or sometimes comes in a little drunk. He pretty much a headache sometimes. 

My coworkers, like anyone you hang out with for long periods of time, have been shaping me a little. You see some of the things I listed about my coworkers and I know that I have some of the same traits. I see all the flaws in them, but you cant help but love them. Its weird that you coworkers become your family. Sometimes you have that brother or sister that annoys you or the embarrassing uncle, but you love them all the same. I guess coworkers are like that for small parts of your life. Good thing about coworkers you can leave them anytime.

eeeyyyaaaahhhh moments

In 2004 Howard Dean (a candidate for the democratic nomination) when on this infamous tirade, He just finished third in the Iowa Caucaus. The next day people kept playing this video. I heard it and I was like this man is nuts. "No way am I going to vote for him." as I muttered in my head. America agreed with me. He pulled out of the election in February. John Kerry won the democratic nomination and eventually lost to George W Bush for Bush's second term.

My friend and I were talking about this infamous moment because its still used in pop culture. The moment will live on in history as the eeeeyyyyaaahhhh moment (I think Im the only one who calls it that most people are just like "remember when that guy went nuts and started yelling state names and screamed at the end") . Dave Chapelle made a skit about it. I thought about that moment for a little bit. What if he never yelled? History could have been changed forever. Think about it.,,,,, Maybe Dean wins the nomination and beats Bush. It could mean that Katrina was never as messed up as it was. No Kanye saying that Bush hates black people. No 2008 recession. No Obama becoming President. No Osama Bin Laden Dying.

I know everything I just said was a big leap. BIG LEAP. But sometimes there are little things that can change history or your life, Life is just a series of moments. Most of life is just banal or boring. But the moments change your life. Small little eeeeyyyyaahhhh moments. Moments you probably dont even remember unless you really sit down and are like yeah that was a big moment. I remember sitting with this guy in my small group. I dont even remember his name. But I was making a choice between moving to Houston or Atlanta. After I talked to him, I knew it was Atlanta. I remember exactly what he told me. "Dan, Houston sucks" Those three words changed my entire life. That was my EEEEEYYYYYAAAAHHHHHH,

I Melt with You

I haven't written anything in a really long time. My apologies. But I think its appropriate to start with a praise to God. As I was going home, God shook me. He moved me like only He can. I like to tell people that I'll shake the ish out of them, but thats what God did to me tonight. Only God can melt my heart like that. In a split second, my heart can go from Cold to melted in an instant. As I was listening to the radio, God just chose to hit that switch. I want to Thank God. A feeling where all the love, joy, hope and peace is restored to you. In a single breath and my day, my week, my year was saved. Only God can do magical and miraculous things like that. If you never had that feeling, I pray that you do. Pray to God tonight to give that to you.


 O Lord, Thank you.

ALL THE TIME!!!!

Sometimes I think that God loves me more than other people. Is that true? Probably not, but the things that God does for me makes me feel that way. Yesterday I was able to do an act of kindness for some kid. I picked up this random kid that asked me for a ride to his house. So I take him home, but through that simple gesture God makes me feel good about myself. God knows me and he knows how to make me feel great. I know through those feelings that God is Good. YES, ALL THE TIME!

I found out that love was forming. One of my sisters got baptized and was saved by God. I heard a testimony of a former Muslim that became a Christian. I hear good things constantly. God gets information over to me and it makes me feel hopeful for the world. People that I love are having great things happen to them and those things make me joyful. I feel like the world is getting better. Through those pieces of information I know God is Good. ALL THE TIME!

A person shared with me that she is going through the Bible and her experience. It made me read the Bible. I prayed and had such a good time of prayer. I feel a sleep, but when I woke up I felt like it was a continuation of that prayer time. I woke up an hour earlier and had to pray. I had to sing songs of praise. He gave me one of those days that I felt like nothing could take away from my high. No person, no demon, no accidents could have take away that JOY I had that day. It was one of those happy, invincible days. Through those times of Joy I know God is Good. ALL THE TIME!


Side note: I love this song. Makes me want to love someone.or maybe just that girl and I aint talking about Oprah. But Ill love her for a Billion.

Devotionals

So I wrote some devotionals for my church a couple of months ago. I got the chapter about sexual immorality...... Maybe God was telling me something. God is so funny. The more I think about my life the funnier I think He is. Well here are my devos:

Monday

9 Don’t you know that evil people won’t have a share in the blessings of God’s kingdom? Don’t fool yourselves! No one who is immoral or worships idols or is unfaithful in marriage or is a pervert or behaves like a homosexual10 will share in God’s kingdom. Neither will any thief or greedy person or drunkard or anyone who curses and cheats others. 11 Some of you used to be like that. But now the name of our Lord Jesus Christ and the power of God’s Spirit have washed you and made you holy and acceptable to God.

I am a sinner. I have been all those things that Paul mentions ( idolator, adulterous, lustful, thief, greedy, drunkard and cheater). But Jesus has washed and redeemed me. God is changing and making me holy.

The problem is that I cannot forgive myself for the sins I have committed. I hold on to these sins more than I do Jesus. I hold them close. Come to Him and tell Him, have intimacy with him. He raises his arms wide and tells me that my sins are already paid for. I have been washed clean.  I am being washed.  He will continues to wash me.  That’s the beauty of mercy, it was with us in the past, is in the present, and will continue to cover us in the future. We can live clean and unashamed.

Because God gives us mercy, let us try to forgive ourselves and give grace to others throughout the day. Giving someone grace is a small fraction compared to the price our Lord and Savior has paid for us. Let us slowly become like Christ.

Tuesday

12 “All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be dominated by anything. 13 “Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food”—and God will destroy both one and the other. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.14 And God raised the Lord and will also raise us up by his power

In today’s society, we have become a generation misconstruing God’s purpose of life.  For example, Miley Cyrus has one of the hottest songs this year, “We Can’t Stop”. Her lyrics include, “It’s our party and we can do what we want”. We are in the “we can do what we want to” generation and “when I want”.

I am very rebellious. PD tells us to give us a clap offering, I don’t want to do it. My mind says,” Don’t tell me when to clap! I clap when I want to.” How petty is that? Rebellion is from the devil pure and simple. God desires us to obey him.

Let us obey God and cherish His commands, not because we want to get to heaven, or lead a moral life, but because we love Him.

Wednesday

15 Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts and members of Christ? So should I take part of Christ and join him to a prostitute? Never! 16 And don’t you know that if a man joins himself to a prostitute she becomes a part of him and he becomes a part of her? For God tells us in the Scripture that in his sight the two become one person. 17 But if you give yourself to the Lord, you and Christ are joined together as one person.

There is a lot of freedom to singlehood. The married men always tell me so. There is also loneliness at times. Times when you just want to have another person next to you. Share intimacy with you or a false intimacy. Like the Cheap Trick song, You want someone to want you.

But think about this verse 17. We are joined together with Christ. For the married people, you know how it is to be joined with one person. We are called to be better. We are not called to be like the world. We like the Corinthians take pleasures in the world. Let us strive to be better, because we know our God gives us much more than the pleasures of the world. Let try to find authentic intimacy with Christ.

Thursday

18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

I went to dinner with a female friend of mine a couple of weeks ago. A woman is leaving the room and I check her out. My friend she calls me out on it. I had no way of denying it. My went from looking at her eyes to looking at the other woman’s body.

Lust and sexual immorality is one of the toughest things for me. As a man, I feel it is natural to lust after women. But I dehumanize women. I look at them as sexual objects and not how God intended them to be looked at. In Corinthians, Paul is telling us that we have to go against the world. We have to go against our bodies. When we sin sexually, we hurt our own bodies. We hurt our relationships with God and others.We think about ourselves only and we are not thinking of the Lord at that time. We become slaves to sin and separate ourselves from God. We are called to find glory in submission and obedience. Let us try to do that this day!!!

Friday

18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

I should probably be a person in great physical shape because I should be constantly running away from sexual immorality. Sexual immorality is a problem in the modern church. Like I said yesterday, it certainly is a problem for me. Pornography, adultery, sex outside of marriage are problems the church is facing. It’s not just the church in general, but our Karis church has suffered from in the past and probably is suffering from now.

The problem in church of Corinth was that the church was not addressing or stopping sexual immorality. I believe that we need to be able to talk about it and not keep it taboo. We also need to keep ourselves away from dangerous positions. We need to flee sometimes. We need to actually be the CHURCH and not afraid of the judgement that is going to come. Let us pray that we will not live a life of self fulfillment. Let us pray that God will help us to die to ourselves everyday, because that is the only way to gain eternal life.

Sabotage

I've been wondering this for a long time. Do I go around sabotage myself? I am not sure. Looking back at my years, I have made many mistakes. I wouldn't say that I was doing that purposely. But I second guess myself. I wonder if I actually sabotage myself because I am scared of an outcome. Maybe in the back of my mind I think I don't deserve things to be great. But things can and should be great in my life. Am I the one holding myself back from greatness?

I see that in my past romantic relationships. I was always scared to let it go to the next level. The level where I have to be vulnerable. You know like let them know who I really am. I feel like I would put up roadblocks. I see it in my career. I would get scared of responsibility and lose drive. I even see it in my relationship with God. I try to hang on and grip the things of this world like a vicegrip.

But this is a new day. A new day means that I can change. I can make sure that I will be great. I can make sure that I can be a better man. 1% better every day.

2013 Recap

2013 was aite.

Did I learn to love God and people more? Yes. I learned different aspects of God. I learned about His character. It has lead me to share with people with more confidence. I was able to share in the Word more often. I finished the Bible. I actually am better at loving people. Better at reaching out to people. Better at reaching out to people that society doesn't love as much. I still have a long way to go, but I know I can get there.

 Did I fall in love with the woman of my dreams? Did I even identify that girl? No but thats ok. I still have determination to find that woman. I am not losing hope. I went on several dates. They were a lot more than the past year. I even tried talking to this girl for like 3 months. I tried to be more vulnerable. Its hard but I thinking Im getting there.

Am I doing what I would like to do all my life (occupation wise)? No but I had a job that I didn't like and got a better one. I get paid more and less worries about money now. I'm trying to get to the next steps and have a clearer vision, because without vision there is no light. If there is no light, you can never move forward to where you want to go.

Did I become more active? yes. I think I am in better shape. ....Maybe

Am I more rounded as a person? I think so. I learned more about culture and things. Not through books but through people and their experiences. 

Did I deal with challenging circumstances? Yes. Getting a new job, things at church, things in my personal life, things in other peoples lives. Through all these things, God was present and helped me.

Am I a better person than one year ago?

Yes I am. I can say that boldly and confidently. I can say because of that reason, I did have a good year. I grew closer to God and people. I am filled with more joy and grace than ever. Humdu Allah. Praise Jesus my redeemer and Friend.

12 year slave

Last Sunday, my pastor was preaching and he started to talk about the chains we use to have. By chains he meant sin. So, I was saved at 12 years old. I accepted Jesus (or He accepted me and probably he accepted me). Now you can raise a question and ask "Well Dan what kind of chains can you get at 12 years old?"

Well you can get a lot.

The biggest chain I had was probably anger. Don't get me wrong, I was always a happy kid. But I had this inner rage. A deep seeded anger. I hated people. Plotted revenge in my head. Did not like people. I thought people were against me. There was no mercy, no grace in my heart. I was just anger. Although I looked happy on the outside, I never had any joy.

Getting Jesus changed it all. The anger was gone. I still had some chains like insecurity, lust, distrust in people and etc. But God was slowly taking all of those chains off.

So on Sunday when my pastor said "remember your chains ". I looked back at my old life and it broke me down. I remembered that anger I had. and I see where I am now. The Spirit filled my heart and all I could do is praise the Lord. PRAISE GOD FOR BREAKING MY CHAINS. I pray that I will always remember those chains. I will remember that angry kid and have more grace towards people.I pray I will remember those chains and not be afraid of the ones that I am still bound too.  I pray that I will remember those chains and have hope for tomorrow. I pray I remember those chains and Praise God on a daily Basis.

God Thank you for Freedom!