bathroom

The bathroom subject has been big in my life right now. So when I was younger I never liked using the public bathroom. I dont think anyone does. I remember taking a poop in elementary school and being so embarrassed. But I had to go really badly. I went to Catholic school and we all had a bathroom time. So I snuck in there. Trying to be discreet as possible, but it was a watery one. Sounded like a bunch of pig slop hitting a puddle. Came out and the kids teased me. By the time I was in highschool, it was pretty normal to take craps. At my job it became a safe haven. A place where I can get away for 15 minutes. We have these motion sensors at work and sometimes the lights would go off while im still on the toilet. Smart phones have revolutionized taking a crap. You dont have to take a magazine in there anymore. You have games, emails, articles and could even do work while your in there now.

Im a fast person on the toliet especially at home. I dont like to waste time. Go in, clean up and leave. Everyone is different. Some people bring their own wet wipes. I think sometimes maybe I should switch it up and become more efficient some way. I dunno we have a whole life of being on the toilet ahead of us.

Heres a funny video:

Father's Day

So a couple of posts ago, I wrote about my mother and how great she is. My father and I do not have that kind of relationship. Really, we dont have any relationship at all. My father left my mom and me when I was about 4. Since then, we really haven't had too much a relationship. I had bitterness and anger towards him. Now all I have is apathy for him. It sucks but thats life right.

But I'll keep on trying to build something with him. Blood is Blood I guess.

June 1st

June first has always been an important day for me. It is the day I left my mother's house and lived out on my own. I went to a new city. I didn't know anyone and said that I will try to make it on my own. So I called my mom and told her this. Her reaction was what did you do with your time so far. I just drove around the whole day and thought what I did these last four years. A bunch of jobs that haven't really helped me figure what I want to do, no dating relationship currently and it seems like a whole lot of nothing at least on the surface.

There is one thing that has happened. I changed. I'm not sure when it happened. Maybe its been a culmination of the last four years, but when I talk to people who knew me in the past they said I have changed. Changed for the better. My mom mentioned it the last time I saw her. I guess when your parent says something like that it weighs the most. It seems like most of the time they are disappointed in you,  but for them to say that you changed for the better. She said I was more responsible and a couple of other nice things. I gave her the "WTF" look. I was kind of shocked she would tell me that.

So I guess the last four years have been great for my own personal development. Hopefully in the next couple of years, I can look back and say that much more has changed for the better.

Tribal Ferret Dance

A friend of mine told me a thing ferrets do. When two get together, sometimes they get really happy and dance around each other in a circle. He says they do it so quickly it looks like a ring. He said he saw some ferrets that were red and golden and it looked like a ring of fire. He said its one of the most beautiful things he has ever seen.

He could be making all of this up, but it had me wondering. When have I been so happy, I just danced out of nowhere. Should I just do some dancing when I am happy? Or do I think that I am too old just to dance for joy?I should be more reserved and stuffy. Nah!!! I think the next time I am happy I will do a happy dance.Now its time to think of the moves?????

Saw this video. I like it alot. but its very dark. Not ferret worthy.

Time Management

I was talking to a friend of mine and he said that it seems like I was good with time management. I laughed. I am horrible with time management, but somehow all the things I want to get done get done. I think its not that I have good management skills, but things to remind me that eventually I need to get those things done. My personality is a guy who is not a planner. I do things spur of the moment. But when that moment is there. I get things done. I dont try to dance around and not do them. I just do.

DP Feeling

So one day, a friend and I were talking about what we thought of each other the first time we met. I said that he looked like a guy that wanted to fight me. My feeling was that if this guy wants to fight me,ok Ill go ahead and fight him. He said that was weird and he never heard of that before. He called it a "Dan Park Feeling". I think its because Im from Philly (BTW I probably use the "Im from Philly" card a lot.) that I have these feelings.

Im back in Philly right now and I've noticed that a lot of us are always on guard. We (people from Philly) go to places and we are just defensive and ready to fight.

But sometimes you look at people and they look like they just want to attack you. I say bring it on most of the time. With my eyes of course. Next you see me ask what it looks like Ill show you.

Church

I've always loved the church. Growing up, I went to a smaller church maybe of a hundred or so congregation. We had a small kids group. They were like brothers and sisters to me. Some of my fondest memories were at church. We just didn't do church stuff. We did some bad things too. Drugs, gambling and all the otehr things that usually you wouldn't associate with church.

My friend asked me why I spend so much time at church. I told him its because I love it. They are my second family. You don't always like all of the members of your family, but you still love the memebers. I feel that way with church. Church is more than a place of just worship to God, but church should be one body. We love and support each other. When someone is hurting we comfort each other. When we don't like our church, we shouldn't just leave but instead try to change it.

People love to dwell on the negative sides of church. "I like God, but hate organized religion" many people say. They say church goers are hypocrites. But when you look into your own liffe aren't you a hypocrite. Aren't we all just sinners, who need God. But God says that we need the body also and the body needs us. We are not loners in the world with our own beliefs. We are suppose to be a community. I feel like thats what we are lacking in society today. People like being in their own space. They like not having to talk to people. I use to be like that too. I said to myself that they can see one side of me but not the other. I realized later on that was the wrong thinking. Or I say I don't want people in my life. I have enough friends. I was wrong. When we have community, we are held accountable. We have people who love us and are able to rebuke us because we are wrong so so so many times in our lives.

I will finish my thought on this someday.....

Mother's Day

My mother was a single mom since I was four. I am always grateful to her for the sacrifices that she had to make. Her family is an academic famiy. She had a chance to be a professor at a college in Korea when my father left me. But she chose to stay in America and work at Dunkin Donuts. She chose me instead of a career or even a better life. She could have left me with my grandparents but she chose to stay. I will always be thankful for that.

 She always felt bad that she didn't give me the life that I deserved and thought that she could have given me a lot more when I was growing up. I always thought she did a great job but she always felt guilty. The greatest thing she gave me was love. She was always affectionate, encouraging and nurturing


She still is one of my best friends. Shes loves hearing my voice. Gets excited hearing from me. Always loving me more than I loved her.

  When I was young maybe around 5 or 6, I wanted a happy meal from Mcdonalds. I asked her to get me one, but she said that we were too poor and we couldn't afford it. So, we just passed it by. About an year later, my mom made more money. We stopped by Mcdonalds and she bought me a happy meal. Ater that day, we stopped by every day ffor almost a week. I was sick of it and asked my mom why we kept going there. She said that she felt so bad that one day she couldn't buy the happy meal that she felt like she owed it too me.

 My mother is always thinking about others. I have never met someone so selfless and dont think I ever will. Always giving to her family. She changed careers from being a store owner to a computer programmer to registered nurse.An amazing woman. A single woman with a kid, doing great things.


I gave this song to her as a Mother's Day Present when this song first came out. She put it on replay for months. It was the single by the way. Not the full album.

Applebees

So, I just came back from Applebees and realized that it has been my hang out place for years. I know sounds kind of sad. Its a place with mediocre and service. The environment is not the best. But for the past 10 years, it  has been a place that I have constantly gone. A place where I've had some deep meaningful conversations and also a place where we talked about useless stuff.

See the reason why Applebees was always good is because of the 1/2 price appetizers after ten.Seeing that I am and was broke all the time, It was the perfect place to go. For some reason too, conversation is always better late at night. Maybe because your tired and you let your guard down a little.

Before, it was a group of four of us. We would go and talk for hours. I dont remember most of the things we use to talk about. Now, Its usually three of us. We usually watch the games and talk. I still dont know what we usually talk about. But we always have fun.

Song of the day:

Cheesesteaks

So While I'm in Philly, I will list my favorite cheesesteaks. I like my cheesesteaks with fried onions, mushrooms and provolone. Some times with wiz but thats just on occasions.

1 Johns Roast Pork- Best in the world. The meat is great. Its on a seeded bun. Bread is delicious. Hard on the outside and soft on the inside, kinda like me.

2 Chinks- Meat is just great. You also can get a mean shake as well. Old time feel inside the restaurant.

3 Steve's Prince of Steaks- Staple of the North East. I like this one with wiz.

4. Tony Luke's- You also can do the five pound Cheese steak challenge.

5. Dalessandro's -meat and onions are chopped nicely. Cheese well spread out over the roll.